Thursday, March 27, 2008

He knows something's up.

We are trying to get Munchkin ready for the deployment.

We've bought our Daddy doll. We've put photos of CPT Dick everywhere we possibly can. We've been doing a lot of videotaping of CPT Dick reading perennial favorites like "Red Fish, Blue Fish" and "Whopper Cake."

And we've started telling him that Daddy is going away. We've read the advice in books (translation: I have and told my husband what to say) and we've been mentioning it casually over the past few months. A bit more now that D-day is coming right up on us.

It's hard enough with a small child to know how much they really understand. And when your child is speech-delayed, it's even more difficult. Most of the time, when we spoke about Daddy going away, he'd either say, "Bye bye!" as if CPT Dick was leaving that moment for a run to the store or something or just make a request to watch the movie "Cars."

But this week, I think we crossed a line. We were wrapping a present for a birthday party and I started to talk about how Daddy wouldn't be back until after his next birthday. Munchkin looked up at me, somewhat alarmed, and said, "No. No bye-bye. Daddy stay. No bye-bye. Daddy stay here."

And since then, though he still goes to bed on his own, at about 1am he sneaks into our room. And usually, when he has a bad dream, he comes over to my side of the bed to be put back down. But these days, he walks over to the other side and crawls into his father's arms.

I think he is just trying to make sure his Daddy is still there. It is both sweet and heartbreaking all at once. And I must admit, I do worry about the night, the night that will come all too soon, when he finds that his Daddy is no longer there.


kimba said...

This story makes me weepy.

I know you're strong, and you don't need the support of a fellow blogger you don't really know, but I'm here for you. Well "here" as in 6000 miles away, to be fair, but here for you in spirit, nonetheless. May the deployment go quickly.

prophet said...

breaks my heart. . . .

ABW said...

It's heartbreaking to watch. Our thoughts are with you.

Susi said...

it is heartbreaking.....I had my son with me in bed every night when dh deployed in Dec 2005. It was just like a switch once he was gone, he came every night. It was a hassle to get him into his own bed again once dh came back....he did the same in 2003 as of my daughter barely came but talked about it much more and cried as for ds , he never cried once.

I'm sorry for you .....hopefully the 12+ month go by fast for you guys (still hoping they cut back to 12 month deployments)

A Soldier's Wife..... said...

this is so sad to me....because my son was 3 when his father left the first time...and I remember all of this so was 10 months later before he'd see him again, but it was like he'd never left. Have you considered the Flat Daddy? I know it seems silly, but psycholgists have said they are great for small children ...... flatdaddies