Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Suddenly, I don't feel so bad about the state of my house.

Last night, I got a phone call in the wee hours of the morning. The MPs had been called on one of our FRG's families. Not for a loud party, illegally parked car or a fight. Nope. Because of the smell.

This spouse, I'll call her Mrs. X for brevity's sake, had not cleaned her house since the soldiers deployed. She has two kids, both in diapers. She has not done laundry, taken out the trash or disposed of a single dirty diaper in nearly four months. She has not cooked either, opting to bring home take-out and leave the leftovers out on the furniture and floors to breed maggots and attract vermin. And she and her children somehow have lived in this mess for all that time.

When I arrived this morning, after the children had been removed from the premises, Mrs. X and a group of volunteers had been cleaning for nearly 10 hours. But I still found myself knee deep in garbage. The walls were covered with brown stains of unknown origin. The entire refrigerator door was writhing in maggots. There was a dead rat in the bathroom cupboard. By the time I left, more than 40 industrial-sized garbage bags had been filled and carried to the dumpster.

I have no idea how someone, let alone someone with young kids, managed to let things go like this. When I asked Mrs. X, she said that she just didn't realize so much time had passed. That it didn't seem that bad from the inside.

The worst part about all of this is that Mrs. X did not seem like that kind of person we'd have to worry about. She comes to meetings. She comes to events. She has a group of several friends that she sees regularly. She calls when she needs information about the Nurse's hotline or where to get a new ration card.

It makes me wonder who else I should be worrying about. And that pile of clutter on my dining room table? Is that the start of something more sinister?




7 comments:

Susan said...

I remember reading about a similar situation a couple years ago. It was before my husband's first deployment... it worried me a little.
I hope this sort of thing is rare, and I'm glad to hear Mrs. X and kids are getting help that they need. She obviously is in depression/denial.
I do not envy your job. The stress of your own deployment... plus everyone else... /?!@#*&

loqi said...

Woah. I thought the stage five clinger story sounded bad, but this is crazy! It's so weird that Mrs. X would seem so normal outwardly, but obviously have some huge issues.

Bette said...

Oh my.

She's so fortunate to have the physical help from you and others -- does your post have something in place to get her the emotional help I suspect she needs?

.... said...

Unfortunately I've seen this more then I care to mention...it's usually not someone you would suspect and by the time you find out, it is to the point where the children are either taken away or the parent is. Mental health is something that people don't realize they need to address, but like physical health it is extremely important.

I am sorry that you and your FRG had to experience this, but I am thankful to the family that they had an FRG that cares enough for them to take it on. God bless each of you for what you do....

And you mess on the table, well it no more rivals my mess in my dining room, nothing sinister, just the normal mess.

Take care and do something nice for yourself.

~ASW

Lee Anne said...

That's horrible. I hope she finds the help she needs to cope.

Marine Wife said...

Wow! Is she being seen for depression or anything. Because it sounds like she totally lost sense of herself and her surroundings.

By the way, that has to be the most disgusting story I've heard in a while. I'll stop complaining about the state of my house now. It is nowhere near that bad. Not even in the same universe.

Bon said...

That's just very sad and even scary. I had to agree, I would be wondering about who else I should be worrying about too.

So glad everyone stepped in to help, not sure how you managed it but glad you did.